Escaping Human Condition
We must treat the victim and the oppressor both with equal understanding, love, and grace: not correcting the misdeeds against the victim by dehumanizing the individual apart of the collective that oppressed them.The only way to disarm someone who only knows to fight, is to show them from a position of power love.
Do not trust them with your life or well-being. Do seek to heal them while wielding power superior to theirs. Do be ready to defend or conquer when required so that they have nowhere to run. Yet, with all of that power do not exercise it in front of them, and do so through compassion and a long process to by-example showing them how to live another way.
It may take hundreds of years to change the heart of a civilization and the trauma that scars the people of it through the present. Don't expect for results in a decade. Don't expect them to understand your long-term view of them as their minds are wrapped up with emotions in the present. For you are shaping civilizations while they are shaping their fists. They are farther from sentience well you are closer to its path.
This species does not get off this Earth without all of us working together. We use power to make the course for humanity not negotiable, and that is to move beyond the pettiness of the present and primitive identity serving as crutches for fragility and insecurity. This insecurity is in part rational so show them grace. It is foolish to be trusting when so many of us still know nothing but to fight because the superior logic of Game Theory and cooperation elude us, because we are not fully sentient yet.
Cooperation functions much like gravity. It requires pulling things together to make something bigger. All things in the universe share similarity and only one thing remains unique: that is human progress towards slowing entropy. There must be a deep message in this that is bigger than our small minds can see just yet. Let us have faith in it. It is too impossible to not mean something big.